17.08.2006 - 10:53 p.m.

This story made me laugh, and out loud too. The man in question, while out marlin fishing, actually caught a marlin, and a big one at about 150 pounds. The marlin was understandably pissed off at this, and as it was being dragged towards the boat it correctly identified its chief tormentor and with a heroic effort leaped across the back of the boat, speared the fat guy holding the rod through the chest and knocked him off his feet and into the water.

It all gets a bit Ahab at this point, and as the fish is swimming for all its life downwards, the fat guy is pounding the marlin�s head to stop it. Unfortunately the fat bloke won the man vs fish fight, and regrettably he also survived the hole in the chest vs ocean fight and even managed to be paid a few grand by a tabloid paper to print his story.

I sided with the marlin myself but it didn�t survive the whole nature vs man conflict, so I posthumously dedicate this entry to its memory, god speed you mighty fish, my your fishy angel spirit soar through the briny heavens.

This article also demonstrates the crappy sensationalism that tabloid papers, and by extension the people who read them love to wallow in, this particular budgie cage liner is the daily mail, which seems to exist solely to scare old people into thinking the world is really worse than it is. The marlin wasn't mad before the fat bloke got his hook stuck in its mouth and had the hook not got stuck in the fish then this whole escapade could have been avoided, an alternative title could have been:

Terror fish stabbed my heart, or

Piscean piercer, or

Fear fish from below, or

Briny bastard bowled me over.

Tesco has finally printed it�s love for their customers on the trolley shelters, once and for all defining how they feel about the general public who make them rich.

The two trolleys on the left have collapsed exhausted and drunk after hours of physical combat in the carpark to get the last space in the shelter, discount retail meets mad max.